(Part 2)
“Showing partiality is never good, yet some will do wrong for a mere piece of bread.”-Proverbs 28:21
As we touched on last week, partiality is a trap that can ruin relationships and destroy families. Let me throw you a curve ball, when it comes to favoritism in your home; something equally damaging as favoring one child over another and that’s favoring our kids over our marriage; specifically prioritizing their schedules and expectations over the needs of our spouse.
Nothing causes me more pain than to hear married people say, “My kids are my life.”
I certainly understand the sentiment, however the message that is being communicated is outright dangerous. You may not realize it, but the message received by your spouse and kids is loud and clear: “I love my kids, more than my spouse.”
Do we allow our relationships with our spouses to suffer in order for our kids to have what they want? Do we strive to make certain that our kids can be in every activity their heart’s desire, regardless of how it affects our spouse’s happiness and security in our relationship? We are only given so many hours in a day. So we must steward that time wisely. If a disproportionate amount of time is given to our kids compared to that given to our spouses, that is going to be reflected in our homes and marriages.
There is nothing that will estrange a child faster from a parent than the other parent openly favoring their kids over their spouse. It does not take long for kids to recognize and capitalize on that disparity. They will gravitate toward the parent that gives them what they want. We need to manage our time so that our marriages are the priority and not our kids’ social lives. They need to see that as a couple we are united in our love for each other and that our marriage relationship is a priority in our home. Listen, if you tell your kids that you love them more than you tell your spouse, there is a problem.
Showing partiality is never good, especially if you are favoring your kids over your spouse.
Pastor Scott Burr
Dayspring Community Church
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